The Times certainly picks and chooses which are printed. That's the whole reason for the interest in the topic. It's a perfect collision between young-adult ambition and old-school establishment vetting.
I understand that, like college admissions, you can hire a wedding planner or consultant who can considerably raise the chances of your wedding being listed.
What is the point of this? Is it some kind of odd "old-school" status thing? The upper class equivalent of being on the 8 o'clock news for a 1 minute interview? Although perhaps this is only for people already investing a huge amount of money into the wedding ceremony?
We used a high-end wedding planner, and when we asked her what to do for the NY Times announcement, she told us to submit via the form on the website. Maybe she pulled some strings behind the scenes, but it seemed to us that she had no pull whatsoever on that front.
I've read these for years and have known people who appeared.
The factors that enter into getting in (from my observation strictly) are a combination of things like:
- parents who live in ny metro
- the parties getting married living in ny metro
- having gone to school in ny metro
- parents or parties getting married working in ny metro
- what the parents do for a living
- any lineage "grandparent governor of NY"
- what the parties getting married do for a living
- school attended as far as perceived impressiveness
- whether an impressive job or title of any of the parties mentioned.
..and so on. That's off the top.
For example, "physician" and "went to school in NY" is probably almost assured to get the announcement printed.
"father a mechanic, mother a homemaker, inlaws are nobodies, parties are cashiers who work at walmart, no college, live in jersey city"[1] and so on either don't get in, don't care to get in, or don't have the drive to even submit a form to get in.
[1] Unless of course one of the parties is related to a famous former politician or some other mitigating factor.
I know someone who hired a planner who helped them get in. I'm not sure how. To be sure, they were somewhat qualified already, but noticeably below the bar.
I've read the wedding announcements on and off since about 1991, but much less these days, because I only get the online edition now.
I understand that, like college admissions, you can hire a wedding planner or consultant who can considerably raise the chances of your wedding being listed.
The NYT obits are another interesting read.