Relax. It's normal to sometimes have nothing to do at work. I recently started working for the first time ever in a Logistics Company doing something non-tech related. I receive on average 1-2 emails every 5 minutes, which I usually have to reply to, fast and without "fucking up".

However, sometimes in the middle of the month I have those very same moments of "nothing to do" and I have made the mistake of telling my manager, literally "nothing to do, give me work" while being anxious because THERE MUST BE SOMETHING TO DO. He's gotten mad at me several times.

Last time this happened, because I have made the mistake of telling him that several times, he called me on Teams to stop me from telling him that. He told me that I should never tell that to a boss, and also, consider that just like you said, those other people maybe are working very hard. He's told me that if I have nothing to do, to just enjoy myself, do some "janitorial" work, or talk to people, and that it's good to not be busy 24/7 with never ending deadlines.

I'm hybrid, so now when that has happens to me, I always just pop to a coworker's desk to chit chat or watch what they're doing and try to help.

When playing team sports, one doesn't always have the ball, but one can still always help out one's team — either deliberately setting up conditions for the next play, or at least making sure one has a positional advantage on the opponents so as to be ready when the play arrives.

The same principle applies at work.

(also, agreed, relax: work isn't always evenly distributed, and —like Messi during the World Cup— you can walk around and catch your breath, while the focus is elsewhere)

> "...I have nothing to do at work..."

No offense intended but that's the mark of a junior developer. Senior developers find themselves something to do, either to improve themselves or to help the business; preferably a single thing that does both. There are always new things to learn that will be a valuable career skill, there are always things at work that have been put off, like updating documentation, code maintenance, or adopting a new best practice. There is never nothing to do.

To forestall the inevitable comment about overwork, people are perfectly free to do these things at as leisurely a pace as they prefer although they would want to have accomplished something meaningful before the next batch of work comes in.

What’s wrong with being a junior developer?

There's nothing wrong with being a junior developer, as long as that junior developer matures into a senior developer in a reasonable timeframe.

I've felt the same early in my career (vfx), but that was due to the nature of making films. I assume most other industries have similar rhythms. I wish I had asked an on-site mentor for a coffee break talk. I doubt it'd take more to iron out your anxiety.

You're likely an industrious person, this is a personality trait no need to fight it or feel bad about it you just may be more at ease when you have something to do. So best to to find something!