You don't need to get off the plane 1-3 minutes earlier. In fact I doubt it would even add up to that. The spread between the first passengers off and the last, non doddling passenger is rarely that long.
Families, friends, couples are not going to go for your rule that one of them should get off first and the other should wait for the entire rest of column to leave.
How about just trying to be more patient? Find something to distract you and those 1 - 3 minutes will be over in a moment.
Those 1–3 minutes can make a difference in a small amount of cases, like tight time spaces in connecting flights.
My ideal plane de-boarding strategy would be to separate everyone in a few groups depending on priorities (people with connecting flights, people without stowed luggage, ...) and mostly make sure that the ones that have to go down earlier do it.
Agreed, but this is HN so of course we need to endlessly argue and overengineer things in order to arrive at the most theoretically optimal solution which completely ignores practical issues.
Families, friends, couples are not going to go for your rule that one of them should get off first and the other should wait for the entire rest of column to leave.
How about just trying to be more patient? Find something to distract you and those 1 - 3 minutes will be over in a moment.