IANAL but I've got some "experience" in the legal area. A felony is a crime that is punishable by incarceration of more than one year. It doesn't matter if you were given one day in jail -- if the crime you are convicted of could have resulted in you being given one year and one day, it is a felony.
As someone who was convicted of a felony at age 19 and immediately turned his life around (yet still suffers the consequences), I wish more people felt the way that you do. Thank you.
Most job applications nowadays have a clause at the end where, by signing, you give them permission to perform a background check (with no way to know if they actually will). In addition, most also state something to the effect that omission == lying. Thus, if you "forget" to mention that you were convicted, it's the same as if lying -- which, of course, is grounds for immediate termination.
I typed out my (very long) story, then ended up deleting it. Let me offer some advice, however:
When you fill out applications and are asked "the question", lie. As someone who has very strong ethics and morals, it's hard for me to say that. It is, however, absolutely necessary if you wish to work again.
Eventually, however, somebody will probably find out and you need to be prepared to deal with that.
The first time it happened to me, I was fortunate in that I had a great working/professional relationship with my superiors a few levels "up the ladder" (very large company). When they found out, they called me in and confronted me about it. I told them the absolute truth and also explained why I lied about it. They sent me home, mulled it over for about a week, then called me and told me to come back to work. It was never mentioned again.
The next time it happened, I was offered a job at a company after one short interview. When I filled out the paperwork, I lied, of course. It wasn't very long before they found out about it (and this was a MUCH smaller company). The two owners, however, knew that I was friends with the Mayor, who they were also friends with. They asked the Mayor about whether they should keep me and his response was something to the effect of "I would, he's a helluva lot smarter than any of your other guys". (It probably also helped that my boss is pretty shady anyways).
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With regard to Google search results, take control of that shit. Start a blog, write awesome shit, post videos on YouTube, participate in mailing lists/forums, etc. Spread your name everywhere you can so that when you are Googled, it's your own stuff that comes up. If you Google me, you'll get tired of clicking "Next Page" long before you find anything negative.
Basically, lie on the paperwork. If you're honest, they're not even going to give you a chance. If you at least get "in the door", work harder than anyone else. Volunteer to work on things nobody else wants to and do the absolute best that you can at everything. Eventually, they WILL find out. Be prepared for that day.
